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When to Have a Baby Shower: Timing, Hosts and Guest List

The best time to hold a baby shower, who usually hosts and pays, who to invite, and what to do if the baby arrives early.

Before you use this guide: This is general educational information, not an individual medical assessment. We do not identify a clinician reviewer on this page, so please confirm personal health decisions with your doctor, midwife or paediatrician.

There is no rule about when a baby shower should happen, but there are some sensible guidelines. The aim is to hold it when the mum-to-be feels well and the baby is unlikely to arrive early.

The usual timing

Most showers are held in the third trimester, often between about 28 and 36 weeks of pregnancy. By then the bump is visible, the early weeks of pregnancy are well behind you and there is still time to get the nursery ready. Many people aim for around 32 to 35 weeks, which leaves a buffer if the baby arrives a little early.

• Before 28 weeks: possible, and good if the mum-to-be wants to enjoy the party while she still has plenty of energy.
• 28 to 36 weeks: the most common window.
• 37 weeks or later: most hosts avoid this, because a baby can arrive from 37 weeks and the mum-to-be may be tired and uncomfortable.

If the mum-to-be is expecting twins, has a condition that makes early birth more likely or has been told to rest, an earlier date in the window may be safer. Our baby shower planner tool turns a due date into suggested dates.

Practical timing tips

• Choose a weekend afternoon, when most guests are free.
• Allow two to three hours. Any longer can tire the mum-to-be and the guests.
• Avoid dates close to antenatal appointments, scans or holidays that could clash.
• Check the date with the mum-to-be's partner and close family before you send invitations.
• Do not hold it before she is ready to share the news widely. Many people wait until after the first trimester.

Who hosts and who pays?

In the past, etiquette said that close family should not host a shower for their own relative, so friends, colleagues or cousins hosted it. Today that rule is very relaxed. Parents, siblings, friends and colleagues all host showers, and some couples host their own. The host usually pays for the party, though costs can be shared between several co-hosts. If you are organising together, agree who covers what at the start.

Who to invite

• Start with the mum-to-be's list and keep it to people she is close to.
• Think about family, friends, neighbours and colleagues. A work shower is often a separate event.
• Decide whether it is for women only, or whether partners and friends of all genders are welcome.
• Check numbers against your venue and your budget.
• If you invite people from a group, such as a team, invite everyone in that group so nobody feels left out.

What if the baby arrives early?

Babies sometimes arrive before the shower. If that happens, you can postpone, turn it into a “sip and see” party where friends meet the baby and bring gifts, or still celebrate with the parents and the baby a few weeks later. Plan with flexibility and keep deposits that can be moved.

Showers after the birth

Some people prefer to celebrate after the baby is born. This can be because of a previous loss, a family or cultural custom, or a wish to wait until the baby is safely here. Parents who have had a loss may not want a party before the birth. Let the parents lead, and offer a quiet gathering or a gift delivery instead.

Customs around the world

Showers look different in different families. See our guide to baby shower traditions for ideas from Indian, British and other customs.

This content is for general information only and is not medical advice. Every pregnancy and every baby is different. Always talk to your doctor, midwife or paediatrician about your own situation, and seek urgent care if you are worried.